A PINK & GERMY CLOUD

H & I are flying solo (solo plus one?) for the next couple days, the parentals headed to Cannon Beach yesterday.  We will meet them there this week to C A M P, as in an actual tent.

I personally love camping, the last trip I went on was years ago was in Humbolt area.  Our camp was in the middle of all of these giant red trees, trees so vast that it got dark around 3pm because they blotted out the sun.  I always have this feeling of being so in the moment when I camp and I’m not overly worried about life.  It recharges me and gives me a new perspective.  Life is so simple, it revolves around just eating, visiting, and trying not to get eaten by bears or bugs.

Camping with a toddler though?  Huh, is all I have to say about that. I’ve come up with several mental plans as far as sleep and early wake up times but let’s all be honest, camping with a toddler will be full of unknown variables and absolutely impossible to contain or control.  Another life lesson for this girl who LOVES to control!  One of my step-sisters has a two year old, so I am grateful that I won’t be the only one toddler wrangling.  My parents and other family members will be there to help too.  There is a coffee shop that opens at 6am, a playground we can walk to, and I will pack tons of weapons, er, I mean tools.  There will be Annie’s goldfish galore, heavy duty wipes, a booster seat, apple sauce, toys that are cleanable, ect.  By ect. I mean like about 50 other things.  I will plan as much as I can like always….Hopefully I can sneak away for a yoga session by the ocean at some point.

Speaking of yoga, not that I’m counting or anything, but there were EIGHT people in attendance on Saturday.  There aren’t words to describe how happy that made me.  I was sick, I couldn’t do all of the movements even 70%, and I kept saying chaturanga for cobra, but it was SO  AWESOME.  In theory I have let go and let god, and tried not to get attached to the fruits of my labor, but in reality?  Damn, it felt good to see a healthy crowd out there.  Yoga, Wilsonville!  Yoga!  I am praying about if I will stay at that spot in September.  The weather will probably be nice during that month.  I’ve had issues with finding another spot although Parks & Rec has been very supportive.  I have felt a break in the former hostility felt about offering a class there, which could just be my own ignorance about what is really going on.

And since I was sick I made a decision to cancel the moms group last Friday.  I went to work and the free yoga sick, it wasn’t about that.  I do not want to be germy around babies, most of the moms bring their babes to the group.  So I was posting a cancel on FB when another mama who goes said that she would cover it.  Next week too while I’m camping, so the Mama Bear show will go on.

THEN, I got an email last week that Peaceful Dumpling had posted a post I had sent in!  Click here to read it.  It felt really good to have that happen, geez!  I may go on to submit more over there, I am pretty knocked out by the site.  It’s basically all about being well.

So sometimes life is hard and sometimes life is good.  I heard that early in sobriety.  Life gets good, gets hard, and then gets boring.  I wanted to drink before at each of those situations.  That is sobriety, dealing with life as it is without taking a drink.  Feeling good, being sober, also known as a pink cloud.  What do you hear when you come in?  They don’t last.

I have hoarded thousands of pictures on my camera and am in the process of putting them on cds and deleting.  The following are random ones I liked as I was sorting through:

I’ve been thinking a lot about self care and what to do when sick.  My sponsor said her sponsor used to always ask her, what have you done for self care today?  I’ve been going to bed early, scaling my practice back, drinking a lot of tea, eating well, sitting a lot, and pausing half way on the stairs.  I am not good at scaling back or sitting.  I would prefer to DO.

I think it is growth if I listen to my body and let it have the chance to recover from a sickness.  I am trying even though it is hard for me.  Another subject for another post.

So here we come dirt, possible toddler melt downs, and bugs!  Life is up and down and unexpected.  I am so GRATEFUL for that today.  I am grateful that I remember everything the next day as well.

Peace & love to you all!

Xo