I AM ENOUGH, I HAVE ENOUGH

I had forgotten last post to write about how I have been randomly (and not so randomly) gifted three pairs of yoga pants! One kind of ‘silly’ thing I let go of in 2015 was an old black pair that fit me just right until they didn’t any more. I had been sewing all the holes in them for a while. When my friend came to visit a couple weeks ago (she reads the blog and saw my post about the pants) she brought me a brand new Lululemon pair which I have since only taken off after sternly reminding myself that they will last way longer if I only wear them to yoga. The are soft. They are comfy. They fit perfectly. And my other yoga buddy gifted me two pairs she had outgrown, one I am wearing below. Thanks friends & Universe!

In other news, we have all been S I C K (we are now all better). Sickness is the worst as a mom because you do that instant mental scramble of wondering if it’s worth it to go to a place where you know people are sick (which is always pretty good odds!), or who will take care of your kid if your normal babysitters are unable to. I don’t want to be shut in all day because I’m scared of getting sick and then I hate being shut in all day because we are sick. I definitely fail when it comes to slowing down for a while. I refuse basically to slow down. But when your kid ONLY wants to lay on you 24/7 what other choice do you have? We were pretty much camped out on the couch for DAYS:

I broke down one day with my mom and cried. I still have such a hard time when things come out sideways. I don’t like crying. I don’t like not having it all together. I’m not only dealing with complete inactivity, I thought, but now my desire for perfectionism is rearing it’s ugly head! I was grateful to meet with my sponsor the next day and unravel to her. Seasons, times, set-backs, up hill, down hill, it’s all tiny, medium, or large chunks of life we reside in. How I choose to deal with life varies. I know it helps if I live just one day at a time. I got better, I went back to meetings. Some people came up to talk me after the last meeting I went to. I thought, am I in Long Beach? It felt good. I felt a part of. I leave meetings early sometimes so I can put H to bed. I received texts and calls, are you okay? I saw you leave the meeting early.

And H and I were able to start taking our walks again. Just taking a short walk really resets our day:

EVERY TIME: DUMP POPCORN ON HEAD. WEAR CONTAINER AS HAT. SCATTER POPCORN WILLY NILLY.

SOME AFTER HOURS POSING AT THE WOODBURN AQUATIC CENTER.

I’ve come up with a new mantra for now:

I’m enough.

I have enough.

It’s been giving me a lot of peace. Take it if you need it.

Yoga is awesome! People come to my classes! I am a yoga teacher! I love it. I am grateful for it.

Oh yeah, and I got on the sub list at Escape to Yoga in Sherwood, OR! Woo-hoo! I’m so excited to teach there and be a part of that studio! I’m already signed up for some March dates. Very exciting, a lot of work I put in, and now it feels goooooood.

Sending out peaceful vibes to you all.

~Namaste.

Published by Liz Brower

I've practiced yoga since 2006, I stumbled into a class at my local gym. I didn't really "get" yoga, I wanted to do all of the poses to the max, I didn't focus on breathing, and I was very competitive. A year later I quit smoking and my mom purchased a three month unlimited to a local studio. I fell in love with yoga! Plus the metaphor was strong, my lungs began to repair, I could take really deep inhales without coughing! I later began to go to a free outdoor yoga classes in downtown Long Beach, CA that was also affiliated with a donation based studio. Yoga was fun, affordable, accessible, and outside! I loved it. I started practicing at home by myself. I started meditating. Right after I found the classes at the gym stopped drinking alchohol. My sobriety and yoga have intertwined ever since. They compliment each other amazingly and I am so grateful for them both. I stopped practicing yoga after getting pregnant and being caught up with the taking care of a newborn in 2013/2014. When he was 9 months old I realized that I really wanted to redirect myself back to yoga. I also had the seed planted in my mind while driving home from Christmas break, why don't you go do a yoga teacher training?! I started practicing yoga at a local studio and began scouring the internet for a teacher training program. I found Three Sisters Yoga, a lovely program, based out of NY & PDX. I was more than motivated to teach, I started teaching some free yoga in the summer of 2015 at a local park. I continued after that with an internship at the same studio I had signed back up with at the beginning of the year. I quit my day job. I hit the pavement, scouring for yoga gigs that would hire a newbie. I found a job and began to teach! Now I am navigating the great balance of being a single mom, a yoga teacher, and doing my best to trust my higher power with my future. I love to teach and practice vinyasa, but also know what it's like to be drawn to slower types of yoga due to injury or body type. I feel a special affinity for yoga new comers and like to teach practice at all different levels. Thank you for taking time to read a little more about me and I wish all of you the best in your own individual yoga practice. ~Namaste! View more posts

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